The fixtures for the 2023/24 Premier League season have been released and Liverpool might as well be confirmed as 90-point runners-up now, quite frankly.
Everyone does indeed play everyone else twice, just as everyone now points out that everyone says everyone does indeed play everyone else twice. The circle of football content is complete.
But not without some sort of top 10 on the released fixtures for the 2023/24 Premier League season. Here are 10 things which jumped out.
1) Mirroring the October 2015 fixture during which an exhausted Adam Lallana collapsed into the arms of his new manager, Jurgen Klopp welcomes Mauricio Pochettino into his latest post when Chelsea host Liverpool on August 13.
Aside from the customary Mo Salah opening weekend goal, there are few indications as to what we can expect from either side. But Pochettino will at least be hoping for a better start than the last Blues coach to kick off their permanent reign against a Big Six contemporary.
Frank Lampard suggested “it was nowhere near a 4-0” but the scoreline from their 2019 visit to Old Trafford suggested otherwise. A shocking start was nevertheless stabilised by a far kinder run which Chelsea navigated by losing just one of their next 11 games.
It is not difficult to envisage Pochettino overseeing something similar. Liverpool is a tough start and a follow-up trip to West Ham hardly represents a gimme, but maximum points will be the projection from games against Luton and Nottingham Forest at Stamford Bridge before the international break, as well as the Bournemouth visit straight after.
2) Lampard masterfully simplified Pochettino’s task by removing European football from the equation, but four teams quite foolishly lumbered themselves with a Champions League burden.
Examining the Premier League fixtures those teams face immediately after their continental excursions, it becomes painfully clear who The Fixture Computer is biased against. And to the surprise of no-one, they have jumped on the anti-Manchester City bandwagon. The opponents Pep Guardiola’s European champions face straight after Champions League group games include Nottingham Forest (h), Arsenal (a), Man Utd (a), Chelsea (a), Spurs (h) and chief thorns-in-the-side Crystal Palace (h).
Each of Arsenal’s post-Champions League fixtures are at home, while Man Utd take on two promoted sides, Brentford, Manchester City, Liverpool and Newcastle. The Magpies will be delighted with their lot, as Eddie Howe presumably shuffles his deck for quick turnarounds against Sheffield United (a), West Ham (a), Wolves (a), Bournemouth (a), Man Utd (h) and Fulham (h).
In short, expect plenty of fixture-based passive-aggression from Guardiola. He’s so happy to go to the Emirates/Old Trafford/Stamford Bridge a few days after dragging his squad to the deepest corner of eastern Europe for a scrappy goalless draw. So happy, guys.
3) Howe might be a little less pleased with Newcastle’s start. Although it won’t take much spin at all to turn a five-game opening stretch against Aston Villa, Manchester City, Liverpool, Brighton and Brentford in their favour. Iron sharpens iron and all that.
It is the sort of sprint out of the blocks Newcastle would have dreaded in the recent past. Instead, what is theoretically the most difficult start any side faces can be pitched as a tantalising test.
4) Emerge from that run unscathed and title talk will inevitably commence. On the other side of that coin, if Ange Postecoglou can successfully steer Spurs through from April onwards, they might even qualify for the Europa Conference League.
It is a daunting run-in. Spurs finish against two promoted sides, hosting Burnley and travelling to Bramall Lane to conclude their season. But everything could hang on the outcome of the four matches before that: Newcastle (a), Manchester City (h), Arsenal (h) and Liverpool (a).
Three different managers were in charge for those four corresponding fixtures this past season. If only one presides over them in 2023/24, Postecoglou will have done well.
5) “It could have been much worse,” said chief executive Gary Sweet of a “relatively kind” first chapter to Premier League life for Luton Town. The Hatters open against Brighton, who they last faced in the semi-final en route to Johnstone’s Paint Trophy glory in 2009.
After that, Luton take on Burnley, Chelsea, West Ham, Fulham, Wolves and Everton, meaning that they play just two teams from last season’s top half – and none of the top five – before October. The chance to build some early momentum cannot be squandered.
6) There is nothing particularly noteworthy about Sheffield United’s fixtures, beyond their first, last and Boxing Day games all being at home. Their first away trip is against Nottingham Forest, offering an opportunity for revenge against 2022 play-off semi-final vanquishers Nottingham Forest – Morgan Gibbs-White missing the decisive penalty for Blades in the shootout – but it is a generally unremarkable list of games.
The intrigue is a little more obviously manufactured when it comes to second-tier champions Burnley, who kick us off with the traditional newly promoted Friday evening slot in a narrative-laden match against Manchester City. The saccharine Vincent Kompany build-up is already unbearable and it hasn’t even started yet.
3 – Vincent Kompany will be just the third manager to take charge of his first Premier League game against Pep Guardiola, after Unai Emery (lost 2-0 with Arsenal, 2018) and Mark Hudson (lost 3-0 with Huddersfield, 2019). Task. pic.twitter.com/C6mqcM7SDU
— OptaJoe (@OptaJoe) June 15, 2023
7) The other sentimental returns to look out for – television rescheduling notwithstanding – include Pochettino back at Spurs on November 4, Sean Dyche offering firm handshakes and slightly-too-forceful back slaps at Turf Moor on December 16, Alexis Mac Allister and James Milner acknowledging warm applause from the opposition fans in October and March, Declan Rice potentially blowing bubbles for Arsenal on Boxing Day, and most nostalgic and emotional of all, Old Trafford rising to its feet as one in April to appreciate Wout Weghorst.
8) If the fixtures offer any possible indication as to who might have stolen a march in the sack race, then Julen Lopetegui and Gary O’Neil could look upon their starts with trepidation.
Wolves will do well to avoid another season of basement-dwelling, with Man Utd (a), Brighton (h), Everton (a), Crystal Palace (a) and Liverpool (h) in their first five games.
Bournemouth start against four teams who qualified for Europe and three who will justifiably hope to. West Ham (h), Liverpool (a), Spurs (h), Brentford (a), Chelsea (h), Brighton (a) and Arsenal (h) is a rough pre-October sequence. But fair play to The Fixture Computer for the impressive banter of sending Bournemouth to Anfield in August.
9) A natural by-product of the Big ranks being increased from six to seven with Newcastle’s begrudging entry is that there are precious few gameweeks with no fixture whatsoever between any of Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchester City, Man Utd, Spurs and the Magpies.
In fact, on only five occasions of a possible 38 – September 16, December 9, December 26, February 10 and May 19 – are there no Big Seven meetings at all. Yet there are eight weekends which feature two games between those sides: one each in August, December, January, February, March and April, with a couple in November. That’s a lot of Super Sundays and a lot of conclusions. Too many, one might argue.
10) Man Utd hosting Arsenal in that penultimate week is a tantalising prospect, while Liverpool’s annual Anfield thriller against Manchester City in the spring sun comes on March 9. And it is fair to describe that as a potential title decider now, because their final game of the season coming at home to Wolves is confirmation enough that the Reds are finishing runners-up to Guardiola’s side on more than 90 points.