With the summer transfer window in full flow, anyone and everyone is being linked with a move to the Premier League – and the Saudi Pro League of course.
The same names regularly appear in the inches of gossip columns and on Twitter, perennially appearing on the verge of that big-money move to the bright lights of England’s top flight.
Sergej Milinkovic-Savic had been one of those players down the years but now finds himself at Al-Hilal alongside Ruben Neves in some type of Manchester United multiverse midfield, which soon could be supplemented by the £1billion loan of Kylian Mbappe. Ed Woodward eat your heart out!
But what about the others? Players you know largely from their bi-annual links with Premier League clubs. The ones you swore had a six-month loan deal at some point or simply assumed so given their presence in the English game on multiple files of Football Manager.
So here it is, a motley crew to rival most: the XI of players we can’t believe didn’t play in the Premier League.
Goalkeeper: Kevin Trapp
Admittedly a tough selection in goal given so many have had late-career sojourns in the Premier League; see Keylor Navas joining Victor Valdes and Julio Cesar for more information.
Trapp just seems like someone who would have been on the books of a Premier League club at some point, particularly given the influx of German coaches in recent years. Maybe he could have been Jurgen Klopp’s Loris Karius alternative?
Back at Eintracht Frankfurt after a middling spell at PSG, time is still on his side to get out of this side and into a mid-table one before all is said and done.
Kevin Trapp announces: “I received a written proposal from Manchester United – world top club. Yesterday, I informed those responsible at both clubs that I had decided stay at Eintracht Frankfurt”. 🚨🔴 #MUFC
Trapp is not joining Man United, the decision has been made. pic.twitter.com/CBk6V6PRAj
— Fabrizio Romano (@FabrizioRomano) August 25, 2022
Right-back: Darijo Srna
The first of the Football Manager legends.
A total of 134 caps for Croatia but not a single Premier League appearances feels wrong, and then you see he spent 15 years of his career with Shakhtar Donetsk, and you just wonder how he never made the move to England.
Instead, he teamed up with many of the ‘could and should have been’ trendy transfer window pick-ups.
Now serving as the Ukrainian club’s Director of Football, no-one can doubt his commitment to his adopted home.
Centre-back: Ezequiel Garay
Manchester United? Chelsea? Spurs?! How didn’t Garay line up for at least one of these sides over the course of his career?
Real Madrid, Benfica, Zenit and Valencia are the European clubs on the Argentinean’s CV, each of whom Premier League clubs have regularly done business with.
He might be one of the few players to play for the first two in the 21st century without ending up on English shores.
Now retired, he is destined to remain a star centre-back only on PC and video consoles.
Centre-back: Maxwell
Okay, not quite a centre-back, but we’re going modern-day defending here and slotting the Brazilian into a Luke Shaw-inspired centre back role.
Where Zlatan goes, Maxwell follows? In the case of Ajax, Inter, Barcelona and PSG: yes. For the Swede’s 18 months at Old Trafford: no.
One of football’s most random bromances didn’t find its way to England and it is a bit surprising given he worked under Jose Mourinho at Inter and the Portuguese gaffer’s dislike of that man Shaw at Old Trafford.
Left-back: Alex Sandro
Another obvious Manchester United or Chelsea player, Sandro even admitted himself he wanted to play in the Premier League over the years.
It never came to pass, with the Brazilian remaining at Juventus since joining in 2015.
Instead, United signed another faulty Samba full-back called Alex in the shape of now Al-Nassr “star” Telles and Chelsea just signed everyone else.
Right-winger: Hulk
Six-month loan spell. Handed the No.9 shirt. Scorer of one goal.
It was all there for Hulk at Chelsea but it just never materialised, nor did any move to the Premier League for the Brazilian rather peculiarly.
From his time at Porto, links and rumours have been bountiful regarding the forward to become the superhero for an English side.
Porto to Zenit to Shanghai SIPG and not even a January sabbatical in the Best League in the World™. A true shame.
Chelsea did get their Brazilian in the end at least, with Alexandre Pato having the exact Blues career as outlined above.
Centre midfield: Nabil Fekir
The Frenchman was hot property in the summer of 2018 off the back of his best season yet with Lyon.
It appeared he was all set for a huge move to Liverpool until it was pulled at the 11th hour in mysterious circumstances. An undiscovered knee issue was rumoured to have shown up in the medical but the player himself later blamed his agent for the deal’s collapse.
Even if his knee was dodgy, he’d have been fitter than Naby Keita. Rather fittingly, Fekir now lines up alongside Carvalho for Real Betis.
Nabil Fekir almost joined Liverpool
Centre midfield: William Carvalho
Between roughly 2013 and 2017, it forever seemed that Carvalho was ‘on the brink’ of a move to one of the Big Six.
While Manchester United and Chelsea were prominent as always, it was nominally Arsenal who were linked with the Portuguese midfielder. They needed a centre defensive midfielder. He was a centre defensive midfielder.
It made perfect sense? Or maybe he just isn’t that good? Will we ever know?
Centre midfield: Nicolas Gaitan
If Carvalho was a mystery, Gaitan was and remains a mythical figure, particularly among regular visitors to Old Trafford.
Without fail for the best part of the 2010s, the winger was linked with a move to United every time the transfer window opened. Was there any substance to it? Has anyone ever seen him play?
Regardless of both of those questions, it’s still a surprise he didn’t become a Red Devil given the calibre of players signed in the post-Fergie era.
READ MORE: Manchester United transfer legends XI can’t fit De Jong in as Kim Min-jae lurks
Left-winger: Alex Teixeira
Another one-time certain Liverpool star gone wrong.
After taking the now legendary route from Brazil to Donetsk, Teixeira appeared set to become Jurgen Klopp’s first signing in January 2016 and even expressed a public desire to join the Reds.
A £25m offer was turned down and within weeks, the playmaker was on his way to China, joining the mighty Jiangsu Suning in a record deal for the Saudi League’s predecessor.
And that’s the last we heard of him, as he toiled for five years in the soon-to-be-bust league.
Now plying his trade at Besiktas, does a stint at Fulham await in the coming years?
Striker: Leandro Damiao
The greatest player to never play for Spurs?
Outside of dominating the Brazilian league, Damiao existed to be linked with a move to the white side of north London, regardless of who the manager was.
A link between Spurs and his first club Internacional was the apparent reason for the constant rumours but the player only ever spent six months playing in Europe, making a total of three appearances for Real Betis (the feeder club to this side?).
Since 2019, the 34-year-old has been the star of J-League side Kawasaki Frontale, but with Harry Kane possibly departing Spurs, could we run back the speculation one last time?
